How do you deal with your husbands ex when there's kids involved

i have beeen with my hubby for 2 years now and is ex has three kids from him we have them half of the time and she has them the other half but when she wants some time to her self she just drops them off weather its our time or not now this wouldn't bother me so much but we have a 2 year old and my husbands works and i am the one who has to take care of all of them so how do i tell the ex to deal with her own problems and when its her turn not to involve us ??How do you deal with your husbands ex when there's kids involved
i would tell your husband to have a frank discussion with her about it (armed with the custody agreement). it's outrageous that she wants to drop them off at your doorstep whenever it's convenient for her. i can understand if it was once in a while in an emergency, but her behavior is rude. you know what though? she does it because your husband allows it! you think that his ex wouldn't raise holy hell if you did the same thing to her? watch what would happen. she is being rude, inconsiderate, and neglectful.





problem here is...if you say anything to her, it could start world war 3. while you are the one being saddled with the kids, i would think twice before blowing up on her and starting a conflict. your husband should be handling this, not you. if he doesn't want to handle it...get some marital counseling, as he is not meeting your needs, or validating your concerns.How do you deal with your husbands ex when there's kids involved
I am a mother of three myself and I have full custody of mine I only get every other weekend off ...So first of all be thinkful you do get a break... Also stop and think about it you knew he fathered three children before he became your husband.Dont act like this bothers you infront of her because it could be used against him in court if you to decide to go about custody issues because this is children where talking about not mother.Do you love them enough to have them all.? All the time? Dont worry about it spend time together as a family show the kids you care enough not to fight mom over them. Tell them you wont them all the time and love them...Show mom you care.
I agree with infinite crisis. If you're the one taking care of them then you need her to stick to the schedule or get your approval in advance. An emergency, I would understand, but just when she feels like it? No. That's being horribly disrespectful. There's a lot of things you can do with just one child that you can't do with more than one and you need to be able to plan your day. That would drive me nuts. I agree with going through your husband on this. And what in the world would she need morethan half the week off for. Man, there's a lot of stuff you can get done with half a week of no kids. Why would she not want to see them the whole time she's allotted?
this is a touchy situation but the ex needs to only bring the kids over when the father is home no other time. She needs to be told when she comes over that the father is not home right now and she can bring them over when he is here. and just keep saying that when she tries to drop them off. Its a little sad for the kids to be in the middle of this and see and hear this but I would turn her away and make sure she calls before she plans unexpected drop offs. she is using you guys.
If you don't like taking care of kids...than why are you involved with a man who has kids. And why do you have one of your own? You sound more made at your husband's drama and it being put on your instead of the kids or the ex.





Yell at your husband.. Its his problem not yours or the ex's..His kids!!!
You sit down with your husband and set the ground rules for him....she has to call to make sure you are available, and not at last minute either, Just because you are her ex's wife doesn't mean she has a built in babysitter whenever she wants....you must INSIST on consideration from both...no phone call %26amp; you don't answer the door.........okay? And then HE tells her.....and sitck to it.
that's your husbands job you shouldn't have to deal at all like you said you are the caretaker he needs to step up. don't get yourself in a bad way with the ex and kids MAKE him deal with it now.
If you were interested, you could use her dropping them off like that in court to get full custody. Otherwise, you have to try to get along. For the sake of the kids alone. Plus I would talk to your husband %26amp; have him talk to her. Coming from you, she may get defensive.
The kids are involve so they are your husbands kids too! Not saying she is right for doing this but they do have kids together and you knew he had 3 kids before you married him. So, talk to there mother and let her know this.
the father should ask the court for a court order mediation..for making a 'parenting plan' between parties, that way she cannot drop them off at her own will..they can settle the details of visitation times..a mediator will work with them..
i would simply explain to her that you have plans, or whatever. she needs to make arrangements if it isnt your turn to have them. she sounds a bit stupid for doing that!
im sorry but you dont say anything to her you must speak to your husband tell him how this affects you and how is HE going to deal with this he must tell her HE
You tell your husband to tell her. Believe me it isn't worth the hassle you'll get from her! Been there done that.
My Dear you have made a wrong choice in your life. But at this stage it is useless to say this. Now you shall be not only patiance but also diplomatic. If you shall use any harsh language then you shall invite more troubles and your family life be more disturbed. First make it sure that is it your ego hurt when the children drop in or you get some other problem. If possible try to adjust in the atmosphere as your son too get a company of them and the growth of child is better in the company of children.If you are in no way ready to adjust then try to take your husband in your favour. Let him know your point with supporting arrguments but with patience and love. In light atmosphere you can even communicate the difficulties to your hubby's ex, but be clever that she may appreciate your point and do not misunderstood that you wanted to get rid off her children. A number of times we can't say a blind that you are ANDHA but use word SOURDAS. In a situation like your you may have to adjust more otherwise it is possible that your child may be forced to face same position as your hubby's ex wife's childern are facing today.